Party Conversation, Part Deux

I don't think this story stands on it's own... Please read Part One for context.

Now, back to that trip to nowhere...

Thanks to status, I was upgraded on my first two legs (Hartford to Atlanta, Atlanta to Phoenix). Things went completely according to plan. I arrived at Sky Harbor Airport (PHX) just after 9:00 p.m. Mountain Time (EST -2 hrs.) and without incident.

The gate area was dead, so I went out into the main terminal to find an open restaurant, bar, store (maybe a souvenir from my trip?) or something to kill time on my 3-hour layover. Most everything was closed. So I found a seat and read my TIME magazine. At some point I dozed off (after all, it's now almost midnight my time).

Suddenly, I woke up, almost in a panic, and felt extremely thirsty. Across the way was a coffee stand, where I headed for a cold drink. By the time I got to the cashier, I felt very lightheaded and faint. I quickly grabbed my Diet Coke and found a seat at the nearby food court. Immediately, I blacked out. My head started ringing, I could only see spots, I was profusely sweating and couldn't catch my breath. I put my head between my legs and tried to pull myself together.

An eternity seemed to pass (at least 3 or 4 minutes) and instead of getting better, my symptoms got worse and worse. By this point, my shirt was wring-able with sweat. I knew that I was in trouble. I looked around but didn't see anyone who looked like they could help. I managed to get myself up and made eye contact with the guy who just sold me the soda. "I need medical help," was all I could manage before falling to the floor.

I sat there, on the floor in the food court, for a couple of minutes with my head resting on a chair. A cleaning lady came over and told me that the paramedics were on their way. She graciously handed me my soda, but I still didn't have the wherewithal to get myself back up into the chair.

A couple minutes passed and 4 EMTs showed up. First, they got me into the chair and started with the thousand questions (any medical history? chest pain? are you pregnant?) and getting my vitals. My heart rate was all over the place...like crazy. Blood pressure was low, low, low when it's normally perfect. They were puzzled and couldn't figure me out (not a surprise), so they decided to call for transport -- yes, an ambulance. In the mean time, they asked me to lay on the floor (in the food court, no less). Before they could help me to the floor, I fell out of the chair. But once I was on my back with my feet propped up on the medical bag, most of the symptoms subsided.

By this time, the entire Phoenix fire rescue department (must've been a slow night) had arrived at Sky Harbor Airport. At least it seemed that way. The crew took more vitals and asked more questions, but by this time the sweating and head-ringing had calmed down considerably. My pulse was still erratic and I was still very weak. So they told me that they couldn't clear me to get back on the airplane -- now my flight is about 45 minutes from boarding (this is not a recommended way to kill time on a layover). They recommended that I go to the hospital for evaluation. So I did.

Here it is: (can't get a really cool video of the St. Lukes Health Center ER to upload...bummer)

Long story short...I was diagnosed with dehydration and vertigo. What happened: When I fell asleep in the chair, my neck was cricked in such a way that it cut off blood circulation to my head. That led to all the other stuff.

I was in the ER for 2.5 hours, taking in 2- 350cc bags of fluids. They put me in a cab at 3:30 a.m. MST and sent me right back to the airport.

I was fortunate that Delta had a 5:55 a.m. flight with a good connection through ATL that delivered me right back to Hartford (with First Class upgrades on both flights)by 3:05 p.m. and with my 2009 SkyMiles status secured!

Definitely a trip worth taking!!!

Cocktail Party Conversation, Part I

When there's a lull in the conversation at your upcoming holiday party, here's a story you can tell about one of your whacky friends...


Earlier this week, I took a trip to nowhere.

Here's why: It's November, and my Delta SkyMiles account is incredibly close to the next elite status level, but still a few miles short. Status is based on actual miles flown in a calendar year(not credit card miles or any other bonus miles). This year's actual miles flown earn status for all of next year. It's different than total mileage balance -- where I have still a huge amount of credit. Mileage balance gets you free tickets, but status gets you SO much more.

With elite status, baggage fees (and most other fees) are waived, you get priority boarding and baggage handling, can bypass security lines in most airports (except Hartford, which really bothers me), get free or discounted lounge access and -- perhaps most significant -- get automatic priority upgrades from coach to first.

I've enjoyed status with Delta for almost 15 years, and I'm fortunate to get upgraded on almost every flight I take (which is a lot). Upgrades used to mean just priority boarding (guarantees overhead bin space) and a roomier seat, but with the airlines charging for everything now, being upgraded means even more. First class passengers don't have to pay for blankets or pillows (up to $7 on most airlines), headphones for the movie (a bargain at $2--and only if you don't have your own), food (Delta offers a full menu starting at $2 for a bag of peanut M&Ms), and drinks ($7 in coach vs. free and free-flowing in First).

So now, back to my trip to nowhere. I was about 1,200 miles short of achieving status, with no further travel plans through December. I realized this a few weeks back. So I found a hole in my schedule and started searching for farthest-and-cheapest-flights. Don't believe what you read about ticket prices. I found a round trip from Hartford (cheaper parking than my New York airport options) to Phoenix for $138, so I booked it.

My plan was to depart Hartford 3:00 p.m. on Monday, connect through Atlanta, and arrive Phoenix 9:30 p.m. Then I had a 3 hour layover and a 12:30 a.m. red-eye back through Atlanta, delivering me back to my short-term parked car promptly at 10:00 a.m. Tuesday. It was a BRILLIANT plan that would earn me free pillows for all of 2009.

That insanity, in and of itself, should give you at least one good cocktail party conversation this holiday season...