Hey Ronald! Wake up and smell the coffee!

In case you don't know, McDonald's has excellent coffee.  Within the last couple years, I guess they decided to compete in the premium coffee (a'la Starbucks) space and improved/upgraded their coffee offerings significantly. 

Finding a decent cup of coffee when I'm on the road is always a challenge.  And this last trip was no exception.  I arrived in South Bend with an hour to spare, so I went on a coffee hunt.  Actually, I was in Mishawaka, a neighboring working class town and one that just may be without a Starbucks.  But I saw a McDonalds and I knew that I couldn't go wrong (or so I thought). 

Giant, banner-sized signs greeted me and welcomed me to enjoy a delicious McCafe coffee of any size for only 99 cents.  "Perfect!" I thought.  "I'll sit here and have a coffee and do some last-minute prep before I have to teach."

So I approach the counter and order a large coffee with milk and one Splenda (my usual).  "We only have Half and Half," I was told. 

"You don't have MILK FOR COFFEE???" I asked.

"We have milk, but you have to buy it separate," I was told. 

"And how much is the milk?" I asked.

"Ninety-nine cents."

So much for that cheap cup of coffee. 

So, dear Ronald, take note:  You will never, ever be able to compete in the premium coffee space if you don't give your customers the "condiment" options they may want for their coffee!!  And isn't it just so McDonalds-like to offer only the full fat stuff instead of milk, skim milk or even the fake powdered stuff? 

Kinda makes gas station coffee look not-so-bad after all!

 

You want WHAT???

It's no secret that Todd (sometimes) mumbles (a little).  The other night, we went out for a nice dinner.  When the bartender asked what I wanted, I ordered a cucumber martini. "Got it!" she said.  

Then Todd ordered.  She looked puzzled.  "You want 'valium, vermouth and a shot of Chardonnay?'" she asked.  She seemed really confused.

What he really wanted: Valley of the Moon Chardonnay.   

And that happened BEFORE we started drinking!